In my work with other helpers, healers and nurturers, I have noticed a common theme- the focus on where someone or something is not showing up for them. I hear stories of workplaces not caring about our stress levels, our friends and family not asking how they could support us, To be honest…this is a theme I recognize in myself when I’m succumb to my shadow place.
We are helping, doing, giving supporting, encouraging, even sacrificing at times to be there for others. Others may be our family, our community, our clients, our agency…damn no wonder we are exhausted?!
But see this comes from some false belief we have taken as our own – Others come first.
Let’s be honest, how many times in the past year, month, week have you put off doing something for yourself because you didn’t feel you had time or by the time you had a few moments you were too tired? Sadly, this is something that happens for me more than I’d like to admit.
And we are so disappointed, frustrated or even down right pissed when our clients no show, our friend reschedules plans, our partner forgets to check in about our day….
Let me ask you this:
“How many times have you forgot to check in with yourself about your day, rescheduled your plans for self-care, and just plain no showed on yourself to do something for another?
For those of us that identify as helper, healer, nurturer self-care can be so hard. It’s like we are hard wired to tend to ourselves last and let’s face it our to do lists these days are longer than we have hours in the day.
When I am in a space of feeling overwhelmed with my to do lists and underwhelmed with the support available I realize that my experience is just a reflection of my inner world. It’s a time to stop and ask myself
“Where am I not showing up for me?’
It’s often hard to turn our gaze inward, but all change starts from within.
In this moment I wake up from all the excuses I’ve made and the running around in circles I’ve been doing and ask myself “What do I need today to take care of myself?”
I’m embarrassed to say that I get to this point more often than I’d like to admit…you would think I could see it coming by now? But it is what it is. I greet myself with love and compassion and listen in to the soft spoken and often ignored inner voice.
My self-care looks different all the time. Sometimes I just need to go to bed at 7:30pm, sometimes I need engage my body and breath and leave my mind behind with yoga, swimming and an extra meditation session. Other times I need to be creative or do something fun.
For us helpers, healers and nurturers self-care can be a revolutionary act of self-love.
This works for me because I’m all about being revolutionary;)
Won’t you join me? Because You are a GREAT CAUSE!
What do you need to take care of yourself today?